I sent the following song to Folgers feedback line. 

 

THE FOLGERS LAMENT 

===================

 

 verse 1

 

There was a coffee drinker who lived on his own, 

Away in the hills in a hut built on stone,

He wanted to watch some coffee percolate,

They called it Instant coffee but he still had to freakin wait!

 

[chorus]

Gotta have me coffee,

Gotta have my caffeine.

Gotta have me Go-Go juice,

where's the machine?

gotta hear that coffee percolatin'

Damn it Folger's

I DON'T WANNA WAIT,

I DON'T WANNA WAIT.

 

verse 2

 

He'd flicked on the power light,

The pot, had started brewing,

He still had to wait tho ,and he had started stewing.

He threw the coffee pot against the frickin door, 

And the dark brown nectar in it spread across the bloody floor!

 

chorus]

Gotta have me coffee,

Gotta have my caffeine.

Gotta have me Go-Go juice,

where's the machine?

gotta hear that coffee percolatin'

Damn it Folger's

I DON'T WANNA WAIT,

I DON'T WANNA WAIT.

 

3.

"Now I've lost me coffee, and I'm getting really pissed,"

He threw a sponge at his dog, and fortunately, missed,

"All this frickin waiting 

It isn't right for me.

Nevermind debating

I'm gonna make some TEA!"

 

chorus]

Gotta have me coffee,

Gotta have my caffeine.

Gotta have me Go-Go juice,

where's the machine?

gotta hear that coffee percolatin'

Damn it Folger's

I DON'T WANNA WAIT

I DON'T WANNA WAIT

I DON'T WANNA WAIT!!!!